the thoughts of older men
I am still in a state where I'm not as witty or biting or as sharp as I'd like to be. Men have comments, and I can't come up with slap-back remarks in time.I was already pissed off at myself yesterday for my inability to get anything done when I went out to finally run a couple of my errands. I had to stop to get gas and these two scruffy-looking men, standing outside the store, were staring at me from the moment I turned into the gas station. I wanted to yell at them, "the fuck you staring at?" but I instead avoided eye contact and pumped my gas with a scowl. But I had to walk by them to go inside and pay, and the black guy says to me something like, "What's a pretty girl like you doing driving a big car like that?"
Oh, really.. I just smiled. And he said, "You can drive that big car?"
Uhm..
"Well you doin' it, aintcha?"
"Yeah..?"
I felt like I looked all stupid to him. I'm just a little girl who doesn't know how to drive big things, right? Well I suppose it would look like it with the front grille missing.
As I drove away, what I realized I should've said to him was, "Sweetheart, I've been driving that heap of junk for 5 years, don't give me shit."
Coward.
I even waved back to him sweetly as I drove away.
Oh well.
Later that night I met up with a friend for free shots at a local pub. It's actually a pimp ass place that I would drive by so often and I've always wanted to check out. Thank god for friends who can introduce you to new things. Now I'm starting to get into the bar life.. or something.. and it does kinda feel like 'cheers'.. "where everybody knows your name".. The bartenders are awesome, you meet interesting people, you get to know people that come there often.. It's really neat.
Last night, these men were having a conversation about how attractive I was. This one guy, sitting in the other corner.. with long dark hair, and a baseball cap on.. quite older than me.. He was a cool guy who would just bust out with comments to say it like it is. Gotta love people like that. And he was talking and for some reason he said to the guy next to him about me, "She's really cute."
The guy next to him kinda looked at him.
And he went on to say, "What? She is.. Don't you think she's a beautiful woman?"
The other guy agreed, heh.
And the guy kept going on about my glasses and hair.. I wish I had listened more closely because it's not that often that you get some random person's candid opinion of your appearance. Instead, when I get compliments I start to feel a bit self-conscious and less aware of what's going on around me.
The blonde guy next to this guy said to him, "You know, she's sitting right there, she can hear you."
And the guy responds, "I know, I'm talking to her..
You're really cute."
Well, uhm.. thank you.
That was when I wished I had something witty to say, but I didn't.
Instead, Dave sitting next to me rubbed my back. For some reason, he quite liked doing that all night. You can tell the guy is really shy and it was an awkward thing for him to do, but he was really trying. I know Dave's been eyeing me ever since I first set foot in that bar. Every night he's going to wonder if I'll be there. He probably had a wild time jerking off and thinking about me last night.
...
What?
Anyway..
Heh, I was going to say something about andrew, but now I forget what it was...